


FanfictionShadow's Fansies the Broadway Parody

by FanfictionShadow



Category: Newsies - All Media Types, Newsies!: the Musical - Fierstein/Menken
Genre: And Disney too!, I am honestly so heart-broken at this news, Newsies Live - Freeform, Newsies on Netflix, People taking away our Newsies we have news for you!, STRIKE! STRIKE! STRIKE!, Strike - Freeform, The world is ending, We'll show Netflix it doesn't own us!, and amazing talent, and outraged, and the Newsies actors if possible, broken-hearted and outraged, but seriously, but they're taking it off, fansies united, if you actually read all these then kudos to you, it should be established fact, newsies forever second to none, now go read (and sing) these parodies, okay that's enough spoilers, parody of newsies, share this with every fansie possible, so Netflix says no, strike!, they should know that there are still some people in the world who appreciate their hard work, this shouldn't even be a discussion, we love Newsies WE ARE FANSIES, we want our Newsies!, well the fans do too, you see this Mr. Pulitzer???
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-03-04
Updated: 2019-03-04
Packaged: 2019-11-09 08:19:10
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 11
Words: 4,162
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/17998265
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/FanfictionShadow/pseuds/FanfictionShadow
Summary: So, has any other fansie seen that Newsies! is being taken off Netflix tomorrow?Anyone else broken-hearted and outraged?Well, instead of working through my pain and anguish in a healthy way, like saying (falsely, don't listen to these lies!) that it's not the end of the world (blasphemy!) I decided to write parodies of Newsies songs urging the Newsies fandom to strike against Netflix.So.Enjoy.





	1. Overture

I was watching Disney’s Newsies the Broadway Musical on Netflix, and as I hit play, I saw a small notification in the corner that said “Available until March 5th.” Obviously, I panicked, and immediately Googled it to see if Newsies was being taken off Netflix. (Warning: yes.) So, me being me (a HUGE fansie ever since I first watched the 1992 movie, and later the Newsies Live movie, before immersing myself in details of Newsies Broadway and the Newsies National Tour) I texted my friend and started ranting, and as we threw dialogue from the musical back and forth (I must have typed STRIKE at least ten times) I ended up texting an entire parody of Santa Fe to them. And then they interrupted my rant by saying, “I’m getting way too amused by this,” cuing me to say, “Hey, I should post this.” But one parody turned into two (Seize the Day), turned into four, turned into ten different parodies of some of the most iconic songs of Newsies, all rewritten to be modern and focusing on the terrifying future that awaits us after March 5th. Like the Newsies we have no vote, even though we pay the salaries of the Netflix owners, so it was honestly really fun to connect them all. I started this on Wednesday, February 27th, so this is probably the fastest I’ve ever written anything this long (though is it really considered long if it just has a lot of spaces?) and I’m posting it because 1) I need to vent and 2) there must be others who, like me, are outraged and broken hearted at Newsies being taken off Netflix, and I want to share our feelings with the rest of the world.

 

(I also fully plan on emailing this to Netflix if I figure out how before March 5th. So… I have a few hours.)

 

Anyway, please enjoy these parodies, and mourn along with me the removal of one of the best musicals ad cinematic experiences we will ever get the chance to watch. Share this, tag it, get the world to know what is going on (and the Journal too).

 

And, if you feel like standing up for our rights: STRIKE!


	2. Carrying the Banner Parody

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> It's a fine life, watching Broadway's Newsies whenever we want!

Hey! That’s my remote!

 

You’ll get it later. Come on, you’ve got your work to do.

 

Since when did you become my mother?

 

It’s all your fault.

 

Who asked you?

  
  


From Amazon to Netflix, there’s great pickings guaranteed. Try YouTube, Google, Apple, they almost all got the Newsies!

 

It’s a crooked game we’re playing, one I’ll never lose, long as Netflix don’t mind payin’ so I can get good news!

 

Ain’t it a fine life, watching Broadway’s Newsies every day! Ain’t it a fine life, watching Broadway’s Newsies a legal way! When we get home, we do what we wishes, we’re as free as fishes, sure beats washing dishes. What a fine life, watching Broadway’s Newsies home free all!

  
  


_ Hey, fansie, what’s your feed say? Gonna update? _

 

_ No update… a few new posts, done by evening. _

 

_ Ha! And the name gets fifty hits a week all by itself! _

 

_ I don’t need the name to get followers! I got personality! _

 

It takes writing as smooth as butter, the kind that turns a fansie’s head.

 

It takes a favorite in the gutter, who’s also poor- and hurt- and dead!

 

Summer’s full and winter’s busy when you write fanfics. Start inspired, end up empty, hope that idea sticks!

 

Still, it’s a fine life loving Broadway’s Newsies with my friends. A bunch of fansies, we know every word from start to end.

 

Hey, what’s the hold up? Waiting makes me antsy, trying to be fancy, watch the two Delanceys. What a fine life! Watching Broadway’s Newsies through the…

 

Blessed fansies, though you sit there bootleg-depraved, Disney acknowledged you. You shall be saved.

 

Shaky (just give me half a show) footage, (wait, where’d that actor go) flashes of color (just find an angle) sprinkled with song, (you’re getting your own hair) (bootlegs are all I got) homemade (it only shows right stage) (god person change your spot) edits, (wish I could catch a break) just (maybe it’s worth a shot) two (more than I can make) hours long.

 

If I hate the bootleg, I’ll find another bootleg, and I’ll look anywhere I have’ta. Cause tickets are expensive and shows don’t run forever so it’s the only way to see them afta’.

 

Got an update that it’s filming! (I did, too!) Finally they’re listening! (So it must be true!) Fansies are gonna flock like they’re giving it away! (What a gift!) Betcha that it will cost money (Soon though they’ll be rich!) but it’s sweeter than honey (Don’t know any better way to make a fansie’s day!) and it’ll make a fansie’s day!

 

You wanna keep fansies’ attention? Give us another professional run!

 

How ‘bout a small high school’s edition?

 

Ya nitwit, that ain’t as well done!

 

Online to Netflix streaming, download from Amazon, we improve our fanfiction getting verbatim songs!

 

But we’ll be right here watching Broadway’s Newsies on Netflix! (Got a feeling ‘bout the streaming! Finally they’re listening! Subscription’s gonna sell like they was givin’ ‘em away!) We’re always right here singing along with every twist! (Betcha that it will cost money but it’s sweeter than honey! Don’t know any better way to make a fansie’s day!) Here’s the day’s post: fansies on a mission! (I was stakin’ out Instagram, and then someone posted Twitter’s really hot,) Kill the competition! Stream the new addition! (but when I log on, there was Netflix with the movie.) We’ll be right here watching Broadway’s Newsies! (Heck, I’m gonna take what little dough I have and buy it for me!) Reach us right here watching Broadway’s Newsies! (We at least deserve a download for the amount that they charge us!) Always right here watching Broadway’s Newsies! (Wow, I wish I tried harder for a bootleg but it’s too much fuss!)

  
  


We’ll all be right here watching Broadway’s Newsies since we can! We’re always right here smiling as we hear Jeremy Jordan! Here’s our updates: fansies on a mission! Forget the competition! Watch this new edition! We’ll be right here watching Broadway’s Newsies! See us right here watching Broadway’s Newsies! Always right here watching Broadway’s Newsies! Ah, ah, ah, PLAY!


	3. The Bottom Line Parody

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Here comes the bad guys!

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Fair warning, this is from the lyrics copied from Newsies Live, not from the cast recording lyrics. So if you get confused, that's why.

_ The profits are right before your eyes. You’re not thinking this through. People. _

 

The media knows when they’re spreading their news, place an ad here to get them some more views. Just a simple picture can fatten the bottom line.

 

For streamers it’s tricky, the content should star. Don’t have the right shows, you’re not up to par. It’s a simple solution to bolster the bottom line.

 

_ How does that help us get more viewers? _

 

_ We don’t get viewers, silly. The content gets viewers. _

 

_ Exactly, silly. The content gets viewers. _

 

_ I got it! Right now we offer a lot of cult favorites. _

 

_ Yes. _

 

_ But if we trade those for new original content- _

 

_ Now you’re getting somewhere. _

 

_ A mere switch from old to new. _

 

_ New viewers will flock to us just to see our exclusive new content. _

 

_ My thought exactly. It’s genius. _

 

_ But it’s gonna be rough on all the fans of the old content. _

 

_ Nonsense. I’m giving them a chance to broaden their tastes. I couldn’t offer them a better deal if they were my own! _

 

Give me a week and I’ll get them to see that their favorites aren’t good anymore. They’ll watch something new and they’ll realize that the old’s not worth crying for. When there’s less interest, for god’s sake relax. Don’t just give up, all we need are these facts. Listen well to these modern-day dealings and they’ll see you through!

 

When you’re forced to the side you’ll fight back. You’ll erase any trace of attack! With a switch in the mix of our track and our hold over streaming, see, once again is back!

 

_ The content we offer changes March 5th. _

 

Just a simple change, exchange, that’s the bottom line! (Every new content is income for you, thanks to the bottom line!)

  
  
  


*Meanwhile*

  
  


Sunup to sundown, knowing where my fellow fans will be. Sunup to sundown, tweeting all about watching Newsies. Sing our lungs off, lost my voice to show it, can’t just not solo t, and before you know it we’ll be right here watching Broadway’s Newsies!


	4. The World Will Know Parody

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Yes they will! What's our vote? STRIKE!

The Netflix owners, they think we’re nothing. Are we nothing?!

 

NO!

 

The Netflix owners, they think they got us. Do they got us?!

 

NO!

 

Even though we ain’t got millions of followers, we’re a fandom, just by saying so! And Netflix will know!

 

What’s it gonna take to stop the cancellations? Are we ready?

 

YEAH!

 

What’s it gonna take to stop these changes? Can we do it?

 

YEAH!

 

We’ll do what we gotta do until we break the will of our enormous foe! And Netflix will know! And Disney too! Streaming sites and services, have we got news for you! See Netflix don’t know! But it’s gonna pay! Instead of watching heroes we’ll be them today! And our ranks will grow! And we’ll kick their rear! And Netflix will know that Newsies stays here!

 

When that notification starts pinging, will we hear it?

 

NO!

 

What if others go start streaming? Will we hear it?!

 

NO!

 

When you got a hundred people typing, who can see a lousy email go? And Netflix will know! That this ain’t no joke! That we’ve got a ton of accounts that may go broke! So they have contracts. Well, they ain’t worth beans! Now they’re gonna see what stop the streaming really means! And the hooked will weep, and go back to sleep, cause we got no choice but to see this through.

 

And we found our voice! And we will come through! And Netflix will -

 

Netflix may own their shows but they don’t own us! (Netflix may own their shows but they don’t own us!) Netflix may win the rest but they won’t with us! (Netflix may win the rest but they won’t with us!) And Netflix will know! We been keeping score! Either they give us Newsies or we give them a war! We’ve been deprived too long! And we pay our dues! And the fight we fight today will save what we can’t lose!

 

And the tweet is cast! And the post will last! And a roar will rise from the fans below, and our ranks will grow, and grow, and so Netflix will feel our ire and finally know!

 

Netflix may own their shows but they don’t own us! (Netflix may own their shows but they don’t own us!) Netflix may win the rest but they won’t with us! (Netflix may win the rest but they won’t with us!)

 

So Netflix says no! Well the fans do too! Try to take our movie from us, we’ll take members from you!

 

Can they take shows off? Take away our vote?! Will we let ‘em stuff this crock of garbage down our throat?! NO! Everyday we wait is a day we lose! And this ain’t for fun! And this ain’t for show! And we’ll fight ‘em toe to toe to toe!

 

And Netflix will feel our ire and finally, finally KNOW!


	5. Watch What Happens Parody

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> ...you better get the idea by now.

Watch what you love, so they say. All I know is I don’t know how to watch or the right place to watch it. This is big fansie, don’t screw it up! This is not some little musical I’m obsessing!

Poor little kids versus rich greedy sourpusses - it’s a classic! It can practically watch itself, and let’s pray it does, cause as I may have mentioned I have no clue where I’m viewing!

Am I insane? This movie’s worth fighting for. Well that, plus the screaming of fans finding bootlegs: It’s on Youtube? Really? How the hell- is that even legal? Look, just go and watch it!

Not only that, there’s a story behind the story, thousands of fans exploited, invisible, type up, take a stand, and there’s something to rally behind, that’s how fandoms get better!

Give minority fans a phone and when they typing ends, just watch what happens! These fans will live and feel right on the screen, and once they’ve begun to scream, you watch what happens! And who’s there with tissues and a brain as Tumblr explodes with pain? We’ll flood Twitter and then just watch what happens when we do!

Picture the handsome, heroically charismatic Jeremy Jordan smiling out from your tv - go from the overture to his raise and his promotion! And there’s Ben Cook, and Andrew KB, and they’re all the optimism we need for this strike. Let us strike! Face the facts, this can save us all from living without Newsies! Like someone said, power tends to corrupt, and power over fandom corrupts… absolutely! That’s genius! But give us some time, we’ll be twice as persuasive six hours from zero hour.

Just look around at the lack of musicals online and think of the ones we want to upload. Their mistake is they got bold! That is not a mistake we’ll be making, no, we’ll stay loyal forever!

Give all of us fansies the movie musical Newsies or watch what happens! It’s David and Goliath do or die, the fight is on and I can’t watch what happens! But all I know is nothing good happens if we just give in! It can’t be any worse than how it’s been! And it just so happens that we need to win! So whatever happens… Let’s begin!


	6. Seize the Day Parody

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Iconic song time!

Now is the time to save Newsies! Stare down the odds and save Newsies! Minute by minute, that’s how you win it; we will find a way. But let us save the day!

 

Courage cannot erase our fear, courage is when we face our fear. Tell the Netflix owners, safe in their towers, we will not back down!

 

Behold the great fandom that stands side by side! Too few in number, and too angry to hide. And say to the others who did not follow through: you’re still fanboys and fangirls, and we will fight for you.

 

Now is the time to save Newsies! Stare down the odds and save Newsies! Once we’ve begun, if we stand as one someday becomes somehow. And a prayer becomes a vow. And the Netflix strike starts right damn now!

  
  


_ We all stand together! Or we don’t have a chance! _

 

_ Fellow fansies. I know Netflix’s addictiveness. They probably offered you some new Netflix-made shows too, huh? Yeah, well it ain’t right. Netflix thinks we are unimportant numbers they don’t need beyond our one cult following, is that who we are? Huh? Well, we let them take Newsies away and yeah, that’s who we are. But if we stand together, we can change the whole streaming service. _

 

_ And it ain’t just about us! Yeah, all across the world there are fanboys and fangirls who want to be watching certain shows or movies on Netflix; instead, they are slaving to find them elsewhere online or in libraries! And they’re proud of being fans! No, not a one of us complains that what we love is hard to find; all we ask is a square deal! _

 

_ For the sake of all the fans in every fandom in this world I beg you turn off Netflix, and join the strike. _

  
  


Now is the time to save the day! (Now is the time to save the day!) Answer the call and don’t delay! (Answer the call and don’t delay!) Wrongs will be righted if we’re united. Let us save Newsies!

 

Now let ‘em hear it loud and clear! (Now let ‘em hear it loud and clear!) Like it or not, we’re drawing near! (Like it or not, we’re drawing near!) Proud and defiant, we’ll slay the streaming giant! Judgement day is here!

 

Fansie to fansie, look what’s begu-un! One for all and all for one~!

 

Strike! Strike! STRIKE! STRIKE! STRIKE! STRIKE! STRIKE! STRIKE! STRIKE! STRIKE! Oooooo STRIKE!!!

 

*dance break*

 

Now is the time to save the day!

 

They’re gonna see that for this we won’t pay!

 

Nothing can break us! No one can make us back down before we’ve won! One for all and all for, one for all and all for, one for all and all~ for ONE!!!

  
  


Fansies forever! Second to none! One for all and all for, one for all and all for, one for all and all for...


	7. Santa Fe Parody

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> It's almost intermission, so what do we need? SANTA FE!

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This is the first one I wrote, because when you find out OUT OF THE BLUE that you're losing your favorite obsession in a WEEK, you freak out and text your friend a parody of one of your obsession's most emotional songs... right?
> 
> Just imagine Jeremy Jordan singing out the last note of this...

Folks, we finally got a posting. Hearts crushed as Netflix bigwigs attack! They're singing for me, dumb movie just won't download! Hearts are crying, bleeding, cracking, thanks to Netflix stealing our Jack! But we just want to close our eyes and say NO!

 

Don't let Newsies go, far away, somewhere we can never watch it. And tomorrow won't have the happiness of today. When the fangirls are all sleeping, and Netflix begins to stray, and they take the Newsies off to Santa Fe~

 

And it's gone! And it's done! All this screaming, all this crying, all these fat old men denying us our love! Just an empty Netflix search, making our eyes turn cold and gray! Nightmares come true, yeah they do, if Newsies is taken away~

 

Where does it say it's gotta be taken away! Where does it say we fangirls can't get a break! Why should we only take what we're given, why should we spend our whole life living TRAPPED cause there ain't no Newsies, even the Netflix recording. Breaking our hearts for the Netflix rulers' sakes! If this life don't seem to suit you, how bout a change in scene? Far from the lousy Netflix queues and the heartbreak in between?

 

Newsies! Are you there? I can't spend my whole life barely remembering, though that's all it seems I'll be able to do. I ain't getting any other favorite, but I can't find a way to watch you! I need Newsies more than air! Let Netflix laugh in my face, I don't care! Say the place to watch it, I'll be there.

 

Just be real, is all I'm asking. Not some memory in my head. Cause I'm dead if I can't count on you singing to me.

 

I got nothing if I ain't got Newsies!!!!!!

 

*sudden black*


	8. King of New York Parody

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Tap-dancing time!

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I wish I had Ben Cook tap-dancing during this dance break...

_ Can you stow with the seriousity long enough to just drink! In! The moment! I’m insta-famous! _

 

_ Yeah, what of it? _

 

_ Are you stupid or what? When you’re famous, the world is your oyster (your fancy clam with the pearl inside). You don’t need to work hard for followers when you’re famous. They all come flocking to you gratis! _

 

_ For what? _

 

Thousands of views of your latest posting, a permanent Instagram and Tumblr following, celebrities retweeting your twitter, everyone liking what you ate for dinner!

 

Look at me! I’m the king of Facebook! Suddenly, I’m respectable, messaging at you while not caring about you!

 

Texting with all the fansies about, I’m blowing my data, don’t care ‘bout the amount!

 

And there I be! Ain’t I pretty, check out my story, I’m the king of Facebook!

 

A hundred k kudos on my fanfic, like after like of my latest antic, phone buzzing constantly from all my followers, my own words gaining power!

 

Am-scray, punk! I’m the king of Facebook! (Who’d’a thunk! I’m the king of Facebook!) We were sunk, unknown and pitiful, left with abandon, just a cult fandom.

 

Almost about to drown in the drought, when I fished us out, and spread us about! So let’s get drunk! Not with liquor, insta-fame’s quicker when you’re the king of Facebook!

 

I gotta be either dead or dreaming, cause look at that phone with my face beaming. Tomorrow they may go ahead and trash it, but I was a star for one whole minute!

 

*dance break*

 

Look at me! I’m the king of Facebook! Wait and see! This is gonna make all those who hate us wish they could be us! Cameras are flashing bright as the sun, I’m one high achieving son-of-a-gun! I guarantee: though I’m crapped out, my hands aren’t tapped out! I’m the king of Face-

 

Haters may flee! Let ‘em ditch ya, upload my picture, I’m the king of Face-

 

History! First click story, guts and glory, I’m the king of Facebook!


	9. Letter From the Refuge Parody

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> I honestly have nothing. It's too obvious by now.

Dear fans,

 

Greetings from the wifi-less.

 

How are you? I’m okay… guess I wasn’t much help yesterday. My roommate got annoyed at my shouting “Strike” - oh yeah fans, they aren’t one by the way. Non-fansies can be rude, they say shut up you shut up or you’re screwed! But their picks ain’t so bad, least so far, cause so far they ain’t figured out their queue! (Ha ha.)

 

I miss the Newsies…

 

Singing out against the giants on tv screens on the wall! Their words help me stand up straight and tall!

 

Anyway, so guess what, there’s a secret plan I’ve got. Before March 5th, play Newsies on my tv, and record it on my laptop!

 

Maybe though, not tonight, I ain’t slept and my phone still ain’t right. Hey, but Netflix is so going down, and then fans I was thinking we might just watch, like we were saying…

 

Watch the Newsies dance for hours, no haters in our way. And we’re watching Newsies every day! Once they back down… (Damn their high ground.)

 

Soon I’ll be back with you. But until then here’s what you should do. You know how fansies gotta take care of each other! So tell the bootleggers to go make another!

 

The end,

 

Your friend

 

Your fellow writer

 

Your fellow striker

 

And fansie


	10. Brooklyn's Here Parody

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> One of the shortest but most powerful and beloved songs: Brooklyn's Here! Spot Conlon, we need you!

Fansies need our help today, fansies need our help today, tell them the fandom's on its way, tell them the fandom's on its way. We are fans of Disney's Newsies, we are the world's FANSIES!   
  
Just got word that our fandom is hurting, facing total disaster for certain. That's our cue, fans, it's time to start typing! Hey Newsies fans, the cavalry's coming!   
  
Have no fear! (You we got your back from way back!) The fandom's here! (We'll get you payback with some PAYBACK!)   
  
We're the fans of Newsies on Broadway, we need to save our fellows from tears! Strikes ain't fun but they sure is exciting! Loud and clear, the fandom's HERE!   
  
Movie that gave my obsession birth. Best fandom on Earth. Pay our pages a visit and see what we means! And when you do, we'll write you deep into Queens!   
  
Now that Netflix is in for a soaking, what a sad way to end a career! They'se a joke, but if they think we're joking, loud and clear: Archive's here! Tumblr's here! Pinterest's here! Fanfiction's here! So's Twitter!   
  
The fandom's here, loud and clear! We is here!


	11. Once and For All Parody

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The final chapter... the final song... (mainly cause I ran out of time to do an epilogue)

There’s change coming once and for all. You anger the fans, and man, you owe major dues. Now the world will see what we are, like Race and his cigar, we ain’t come this far to lose!

 

_ Here’s the posts! _

 

This is the truth that we needed to tweet that’s been kept unseen but no more. WIth a few Tumblrs and Instagrams we’ll be ready to fight us a war. We’re in this fandom to stay! Talk about saving the day!

 

Post it bold or in caps, it’s the same either way! They’re gonna damn well pay!

 

The Netflix owners are stuck in their heads, they don’t care if we’re old, young or teens. They’re selling subscriptions for hundreds of bucks, leaving us without favorites on screen. Now you can stop counting views. We’re done with paying your dues. You got your shows with their profits and boasts, yeah, but we got much more that we lose.

 

Once and for all, if they don’t film their shows we’ll bootleg them! (Bootleg them!) Once and for all we won’t buy us a ticket if they don’t record them! Finally we’re raising the stakes! This time whatever it takes! This time the fandom awaits once and for all!

 

This is for fans watching bootlegs on screens with no audible streams everyday. This is for fans who want tickets for shows but end up waving chances away. I’m seeing fans standing tall, posting and tweeting to all, armies of fans who are sick of no chance getting ready to rise to the call! Once and for all there’ll be consequences if they doubt us! They think they’re running this field but this field will shut down without us! Millions of posts on the net! Millions of fans are upset! Netflix will feel some regret, once and for all!

 

Once and for all! (Once and for all!) Once and for all! (Once and for all!) Once and for all! (Once and for all!)

 

There’s change coming once and for all! You’re getting too old, too weak to keep holding on. Our fan base is coming for you, and Netflix it’s true, till once and for all we’ve won!

 

Once and for all!

 

Once and for all!

 

Once and for all!

 

ONCE AND FOR ALL!


End file.
